Dear Readers:
As we roll on towards the holidays and the end of the year, I’m focusing on how-to’s for your everyday stroll through our Second Life.
Dear Lark –
I’ve got several avis here in Second Life but my favorite is a child avi that I invented so that I could be my best friend’s son. That was several years ago. That friend is no longer in SL, but I developed the character so deeply that it feels right to me, and I tend to log into him most days. My problem is that child avatars are generally, well, hated is a strong word, but I will use it. I can’t go to a lot of sims and can’t follow my favorite singers around the grid. Short of going back to my adult avi, what can I do as a child in SL?
Signed – Devoted Son
Dear Devoted Son,
You’ve built something rare and beautiful—a character born of friendship, nurtured into depth, and now woven into your daily rhythm. That kind of emotional continuity is powerful, and it deserves respect.
But yes, Second Life can be a minefield for child avatars. The stigma is real, and it’s frustrating when your creative expression bumps up against bans or assumptions. Here are a few ways to keep him thriving:
- Find welcoming sims: Look for family RP or whimsical fantasy regions that embrace child avatars.
- Reach out to performers: Some singers may welcome you if you message them directly.
- Get creative: Use your avi for storytelling, photography, or machinima—build a world around him.
- Try magical tweaks: A fairy child or elf might bypass some restrictions while keeping his essence.
- Join supportive groups: Connect with others who use child avis for art or RP.
You’re not wrong for loving this character. You’re just navigating a world that doesn’t always understand. And if you ever do switch to your adult avi, it doesn’t have to be a betrayal. You can treat it like a costume change, a way to access certain spaces while keeping your child avi as your heart-home.
Signed – Lark
Dear Lark –
I am fairly new to Second Life, and I am finding it hard to stay ahead of the need for $Lindens. I had to buy a head, a body, an AO and clothes for my avi, not to mention hair and shoes and makeup, and I’m broke! I’m considering getting a job in SL to fund my playing. What are the best jobs in Second Life
Signed – Broke
Dear Broke –
Some of the best-paying and most accessible jobs in Second Life include hosting, dancing, DJing, photography, and creating or selling virtual goods. You can also earn by offering services like modeling, scripting, or land rental, along with less savory offerings in adult sims.
To get started, join SL job groups like “Inworld Employment” or “Help Wanted in SL” to see listings. Check forums and classifieds for current openings. Last, and possibly most helpful, network, Many jobs come from being active in communities and making connections.
You’ve already invested in your avatar—now let it work for you! Whether you want to dance, design, or DJ, there’s a way to earn Lindens and stay immersed in the world you love.
Signed – Lark
Dear Lark –
I’m just sad, Lark. I’m lonely. I look around SL and so many people are seeing someone, are partnered or married. I can’t even find one date! Please help me find the love of my Second Life.
Signed – Heart-on-my-Sleeve
Dear Heart-on–my-Sleeve,
Loneliness in a world built for connection can feel especially sharp. You’re not wrong to want love in Second Life—it’s one of the most human things to crave, even in our pixel realm. And while it may seem like everyone else is paired off, the truth is: many are still searching, just like you.
Here’s how to open the door to love in SL: First, join social groups that match your vibe. Try joining groups based on your interests—music, fantasy RP, fashion, art, or even humor. Look for active chatty groups, not just silent membership lists.
Attend events regularly: Live music shows, themed parties, and trivia nights are great places to meet people organically. You don’t have to flirt—just be present, be yourself, and let connections grow.
Update your profile thoughtfully: Your profile is your calling card. Share a bit about what makes you tick, what you’re looking for, and what kind of connection you crave. A touch of wit or warmth goes a long way.
Try SL dating groups or matchmaking services, and yes, they do exist! Groups like “SL Romance,” “Virtual Dating,” or “Second Life Singles” offer mixers, speed dating, and matchmaking boards. You’re not alone in wanting love.
Lastly, be open to unexpected connections. Sometimes love doesn’t arrive in the form you expect. Stay open to friendships that deepen, RP relationships that spark something real, or even a slow-burn story that surprises you.
You’re worthy of love—not just in SL, but everywhere. Keep showing up as your full self. Someone out there is looking for exactly what you bring.
Signed – Lark
Dear Lark –
I’m a man damn it! At least, I play one on Second Life… and I can’t find clothing that represents who I want to be. Why isn’t there as much clothing for men on SL as for women? And where CAN I get the clothes I want?
Signed – Practically Naked
Dear Practically –
You’re not imagining it. Second Life’s fashion scene has long favored female avatars. Designers tend to follow the money, and since women’s fashion sells more (thanks to sheer volume and variety), male clothing often gets the short end of the stick. But don’t despair. There’s a growing wave of creators who do cater to male avatars with style, grit, and polish.
Why the imbalance? Market demand and style assumptions create most of the lack of symmetry. Women avis dominate Second Life, so creators prioritize that audience. And some designers assume men want basics, not flair, leaving bold or niche styles underdeveloped.
Here are some standout stores known for quality and variety:
- Deadwool: Classic, tailored upscale suits, coats and refined basics
- Cold-Ash: Casual, modern, versatile duds great for everyday wear
- Native Urban: Urban, edgy, streetwise fashion featuring sneakers, hoodies and great accessories
- Strato: Futuristic, fantasy, RP gear, great for sci-fi or alt looks
- Kalback: Rugged, masculine, outdoor goods like jeans, boots and leather jackets
- Tonktastic: Military or tactical outfits, that are gear heavy, and RP-friendly
Here’s some tips for finding your style.
- Use the Marketplace filters: Search by body type (e.g., “Legacy Male”) and style keywords (“goth,” “business,” “casual”).
- Visit fashion events: Fairs like Man Cave, The Mens Dept, and TMD showcase male designers monthly.
- Try demos: Always test fit and texture before buying—some creators nail the look but miss the rigging.
You deserve to strut through SL fully clothed and fully you. Whether you’re channeling James Bond, a street poet, or a fantasy rogue, the right threads do exist. You just need to know where to dig.
Signed -Lark
